Emotional Maturity

TL;DR of the video, plus my opinions:

When someone, on whom we emotionally depend, lets us down / disappoints us / leaves us hanging or uncertain, what is our characteristic way of responding?

Three responses indicate emotionally immature behaviour:

Sulking:

We get very upset, while refusing to explain to the person, expecting them to read our minds to understand what they did wrong. Like a baby expecting parents to understand they are hungry, without communicating it.

Anger:

We get disproportionately angry and furious.

Pretend not to care:

We don't want the person who has just hurt us to know they have power over us, that we care. With time, we might become permanently indifferent, not feeling anything instead of being fully alive

Instead, the following three are signs of a more matured behaviour

Ability to Explain:

Remembering deep down, that this person is not our enemy and ability to find words to communicate the way we feel.

Staying Calm:

Knowing that reconciliation is possible down the line, giving them all benefit of doubt.

Capacity to be Vulnerable:

Understanding that being close to someone opens you up to being hurt. Being comfortable with you own emotional nakedness.

My takeaway from this is, I'm far from emotional maturity, when it comes to my own problems. I give some good advice to others, but I fail to follow them when I face a problem myself.

We can clearly see, most of the Facebook / Instagram posts result from the first three responses. Also, most of the Indian TV serials and shallow movies/songs... normalize this behaviour as "human nature". It's time to understand these signs of emotional immaturity and make a conscious effort to take such emotional let-downs as opportunities to improve ourselves.

First posted on Facebook: facebook.com/abarajithan11/posts/10219526321660153